She Bangs
by Tsubasa Hane
Summary: A cute but funny lil number staring the two most explosive personalities of the X-men. Rated for...well...Tabby. And a little Bobby .


After noticing how little attention Newbies seem to get in fanfictions, I did a little searching and found a great plotbunny of a songfic.  Bad puns aside, the rest of the lyrics fit pretty well into Tabby's personality…and since I'm a big Tabby/Ray shippers, it would be even more amusing to have him sing it!  

Ricky Martin, eat your heart out.

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[**Quote of the Fic: **"My little HoneyBunny was never very good behind the wheel." "A better lover than a driver, huh?" "You better believe it, buster."**]**  
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It was the perfect summer day. The sun was shining, any clouds were conspicuously absent for the day, the weather was hot, and the pool water was cool. While the older X-men were out on some mission for the day, the New Recruits chose to use that opportunity to claim the Institute Mansion's luxurious pool area. 

Hey…just because they couldn't go on missions didn't mean they couldn't have any fun!

Currently, the lot of them have taken the majority of the lounge chairs and clustered them together in a little circle, many of them each in their own little world. Amara and Roberto are off to the side, both sunbathing and the former finding herself engrossed in some cheesy romance novel. Jamie rests in his chair on his stomach, listening to his Discman and happy that the others had finally allowed him to hang with them without protest. 

Bobby and Jubilee, on the other hand, are a sight to see; he had his chair fixed so he could sit upright, and she had long since abandoned her own chair for his lap. Despite Logan's constant attempts to pry the two apart each time he came to check on them, she refused to budge, and he eventually gave up. Feeling rather comfortable, Jubilee had soon after leaned her head against her boyfriend's chest and fallen asleep. 

He still makes no attempt to move her, even now.

Rahne is found over by the edge of the pool, dangling her feet in the water and absently humming. She watches Sam as he uses his advantage of being the only one currently in the pool by swimming laps, completely aware of his one-woman audience and enjoying every second of it. He eventually finds his way over, and the two strike up conversation.

Now Bobby, being the kind of guy he is, knows his girlfriend very well. He also knows that this is something she would definitely love to see. So, with extreme gentleness, he tries to shake the slumbering girl into awakening. 

"Jubilee?" He whispers.

No answer.

"Hey, Jubes!" A little louder this time.

She stirs and mutters, "Mmm…lemme sleep, Bobby." Before burying her head into his chest.

He tries one more time. "Jubes…you gotta see this. Wake up." This finally catches the girl's attention as she sits up in her boyfriend's lap, lazily rubbing her eyes.

"What is it? This had better be good…" she grumbles before Bobby points out Sam and Rahne to her. "…aww!"

He chuckles. "Told you so."

She lays back down again, but remains awake. "I can't decide if those two are just shy or stubborn."

"Maybe both?"

"Hey, guys…check out Bezerker!" Roberto calls out suddenly, pointing over towards the mansion. Sam and Rahne both hear him, and get up to join the others, each donning his or her own lounge chair and towel, but not before earning some interesting looks from the group. As their blushing dims down, Roberto repeats his statement.

Sure enough, Ray Bezerker stood leaning against the wall, not moving a muscle. He was turned towards the back door, and it looked like he was waiting for something.

"I don't believe it…is he still hooked on Tabby?" Amara exclaims.

There's a pause, then all the guys responded: "Yup."

"You gotta admit," Jubilee spoke up, "It's a pretty good match." 

"Sure hope Ray knows what he's getting himself into…" Jamie comments in a sing-song voice. Everyone agrees with him, despite the fact that the comment came from a twelve-year-old.

**Boys:** _Living in, living in Bayville…_

As if on cue, Tabby walks out the door donned in her swimsuit, and Ray sees his chance. Casually, he walks up to her, leaning an arm around her shoulder as if to make conversation.

**Ray:** _Talk to me, tell me your name_

"…you know my name, Bezerker." Tabitha responded, rolling her eyes. Lifting his arm off her shoulder like it was a wet rag, she walks away without a second glance.

_You blow me off, like it's all the same  
You lit a fuse and now I'm ticking away like a bomb  
Yeah, baby_

Not one to get discouraged, Ray walks in front of her, willing to try again.

_Talk to me, tell me your side_

She gives him a look of confusion, and he shrugs his shoulders absently as he explains:

_(Been switchin' sides like a Gemini)  
You're playin' games   
And now you're hitting my heart like a drum_

As if to emphasize his point, he dramatically holds his hands over his heart. Tabby rolls her eyes again, but this time a small giggle escapes at his antics. Ray obviously takes this as a good sign

_Yeah, baby_

She walks away from him, though not as dismissively as the first time. He stands there for a moment, dazed.

_Well, if Lady Luck gets on my side  
We're gonna rock this town alive  
I'll let you rough me up till you knock me out_

The girls, who are all watching, shake their heads with pity for the boy.

**Girls:** _But she walks like she talks  
And she talks like she walks_

**Ray:** _She bangs, she bangs_

Throwing her towel on a nearby chair, Tabby starts to make her way up the diving board ladder… very slowly and Tabby-like, I might add.

_Oh, baby, when she moves, she moves,_

As Ray watches from the bottom of the ladder, she gracefully prepares to dive in…

_I go crazy 'cause you look like a flower, _

…but at the last minute, cannonballs and succeeds in soaking the entire group.

_But'cha sting like a bee_

"TABBY!"

"Anybody get the license plate of that tidal wave?"

"Ugh, I'm soaked!"

"Ooh…she's gonna pay for that one!"

Shouts of protests and anger at getting wet came from the cluster of chairs, including four new Jamies (who had fallen _off their chair from the force of the water). Ray shakes his head at them, laughing._

_Like no other girl in history_

Climing out of the pool, she knocks Ray in as she passes him with one push—gaining laughter from everyone else—before reaching for her towel to dry off, acting as if nothing happened.

**Guys/Girls: **_She bangs, she bangs  
He's wasted by the way she booms (she booms)_

As he surfaces, Ray swims over to the edge of the pool, placing his elbows on it and leaning his head in one hand.

**Ray:** _No one's ever looked so fine  
You remind me that a woman's got one thing on her mind_

"I'll say one thing about him," Amara comments as she squeezes the excess water from her hair, "he sure is persistent." A chorus of nods follow.

Jumping out of the pool in one easy motion, he tries his luck again. Tabby is starting to find him a bit amusing, and doesn't try to walk away this time.

_Talk to me, tell me your name_

This time, the boys shake their heads:

**Boys:** _He's just a link in her daily chain_

Tabby gives them a glare in hearing their snide remark. They all look away innocently.

**Ray:** _Your rap's long as a diamond map of the stars,_

At this, Tabby grins evilly, confirming his statement.

_Yeah, baby_

_Talk to me, tell me what's new_

**Girls:** She'll wear him out like a pair of shoes

A shoe (well…technically, a sandal) goes flying into them, earning a few shrieks from the girls and laughter from Ray.

"That's enough comments from the peanut gallery, thank you!"

Still laughing, Ray surprises her by grabbing her hand and twirling her around, like they were dancing. She drops the towel in surprise, but goes along with him and even laughs

**Ray:** _We'd dance until the band goes home,_

He spins her so that she ends up in his arms. Tabby continues to laugh as she looks up at him with a wide grin.

_then we're gone  
Yeah, baby_

He releases her, but their hands remain clasped together.

_Well, if it looks like love should be a crime,  
They'd better lock me up for life  
I'd do the time with a smile on my face_

Bobby speaks up from his chair, Jubilee still on his lap.

**Bobby:** _Thinkin' of her in her leather and lace_

"BOBBY!" Jubilee shrieks, putting her hands on her hips as twists her body to face him with a frown.

Innocently. "What?"

Her hands move so she can fold her arms across her chest almost in defeat, turning back towards the girls. "…men are such pigs!" 

Caught off guard, Bobby wraps his arms around her, pulling her back so that she ends up lying right on top of him. Anger forgotten, she shrieks in surprise and pleasure, meeting his devilish grin with one of her own.

Tabby and Ray, however, hardly notice as they are suddenly lost in their own little world. She lets go of his hand to reach back down for her towel, and he encircles her slowly as she snuggles back into the warmth of the thick, cotton material. Their eyes never break contact.

**Ray:** _She bangs, she bangs  
Oh, baby, when you boom, you boom   
I go crazy 'cause you look like a flower,_

As he passes by one of the rose bushes (Storm had just recently planted them), he plucks one of the fuller blossoms, handing it to Tabby. 

_but you sting like a bee_

She looks at it for a moment with a mixture of surprise and pleasure, then takes it and brings it to her nose to smell the sweet aroma.

_'Been none like you in history_

She seems almost entranced by the moment, not sure how to react. Ray takes this opportunity to step back for a moment and observe her.

_She bangs, she bangs  
I'm wasted by the way she moves (she moves)  
No one's ever looked so fine  
You remind me that a woman's got one thing on her mind_

Snapping out of it, Tabby gains an evil glint in her eye, turning the tables on Ray. 

**Tabby:** _Boy, if Lady Luck gets on your side,   
I just may rock your world tonight_

Pulling her "signature move," she takes the flower and traces his jaw line with it. 

_Cause I could rough you up, 'till I knock you out_

Leaning in, she whispers the next line in his ear.

_I walk like I talk and I talk like I walk…_

Leaving an open-mouthed Ray standing their, she seductively walks away from him, and back towards the house. It takes him a moment, but he finally realizes just what happened, and runs after her…

**Boys/Girls:** _She bangs, she bangs   
Oh, baby, when she moves, she move   
He goes crazy 'cause she looks like a flower, but she stings like a bee  
Like ever girl in history…_

_She bangs, She bangs  
(oh-oh-oh-oh..)  
She moves, she moves  
(oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh…)_

As the music fades into the background, Bobby suddenly looks at his waterproof watch.

"Whatcha doing?" Jamie asks as the last of his clones disappears.

"Timing." He answers without looking up from his task.

Amara questions further, "Timing what?"

"Them. I think Bezerker over their just broke a new record…three seconds into the relationship, and already whipped!" This earns a bout of laughter from the guys, but…

*WHACK*

"Ow! Jubilee! What was that for?"

"You deserved that one, Drake."

Everybody laughed this time as a wincing Bobby Drake rubbed the back of his head in pain.


End file.
